Counselling and Sex Therapy with Ness Cooper
Whether you’re solo or in a relationship, monogamous or polyamorous, you can find your authentic sexuality. It’s possible to experience pleasure and explore your sex life. I have over 10 years of training in various modalities including developmental, psychosexual and person-centred and I’m certified by the International Society for Sexual Medicine (ISSM) as well as being a trustee for Dhiverse, the sexual health charity. In my private practice, I can help you with:
- Barriers to pleasure
- LGBTQ+ needs
- Dealing with jealousy and envy
- Learning to find time for pleasure
- Rebuilding desire and intimacy
- Learning new sexual skills
- Difficulties with online dating
- Starting and open or polyamorous relationship
- Sexual aftercare
- BDSM and disability
- Sex work
- Codependency and narcissism
- Learning green and red flags.
- Understanding porn use
- Sex addiction / Sexual Compulsion
- And many more.
How Does it Work?
No two people are the same. I tailor each session to your needs and integrating sex and relationship coaching, therapy, mindfulness and pelvic floor biomechanics to help you with your goals.
You can book a single session which is great for troubleshooting a particular issue there and then. Alternatively, a series of 8 – 12 weekly sessions allows us to deep dive into issues and build coping mechanisms and strategies to help you face future challenges with confidence and ease.
What does it cost?
Individual Session £90 (50 min)
Couples Session £100 (50 min)
All sessions are 50 minutes long and delivered by zoom. Bookings of 8-12 weeks also come with optional worksheets which you can use to help you reach your goals.
Types of Therapy Explained More
All forms of therapy I offer are based on working through psychosexual and/or relationship and sexuality issues. I have training in both individual and couples therapy, as well as experience with working with groups such as in polyamorous relationships.
Discernment Counselling
Discernment counselling is for those in a relationship who are unsure if couples therapy will work for them and are considering parting ways. It works differently from standard couples therapy, where there are often a maximum of 5 sessions of 90 minutes in total. During the session the couple enters the therapy Zoom in person or via Zoom, then one partner is asked to leave for roughly 30 minutes, then the other partner has a 30-minute session. The final half an hour brings the couple back into the same space again and we work through the issues that were raised in the individual sessions, together.
After around 3 to 5 sessions, the couple can decide if they are happy to continue therapy and move into standard couples therapy together. If the couple feel that they can’t resolve the balance needed for a relationship they can be supported in parting ways in a healthy manner that reduces negative effects.
This type of therapy is often ideal for couples who feel they have no hope left and struggle to work together. It can work well in navigating hostility and bringing calm between the couple so they can work together in the future if needed.
Session fee £150 per 90 minutes with a maximum of 5 sessions.
Couples intensives
Some couples enjoy having intensives where therapy occurs over the course of a couple of days. There can be various reasons some may want to experience an intensive, from lacking time to spread out regular shorter sessions, to wanting to ignite a spark quickly that can help the relationship run soother for the next few years.
During an intensive, we will work through various worksheets together and I will help you and your partner discover old and new parts of your relationship which can help you grow towards your goals together.
There is a waiting list for couples intensives.
Currently, these are done via Zoom.
Please email me for fees and booking contact@nesscooper.co.uk
One Off Consultation
These are one-offs for when you have a particular issue you want to discuss. They can be for if you’re in a relationship or single. They consist of 60 minutes that are based on carefully constructed questions beforehand to help navigate through the issue quickly and professionally together.
I am able to cover a wide range of topics within a consultation from couples focused to psychosexual.
Fees cost £250 for 60 minutes
Individual Therapy
This is where you attend therapy by yourself. You don’t need to be in a relationship to discuss relationships or sex within the sessions. We will access your therapy goals at the first session alongside an intake form and go from there. During individual therapy, the session is your time to use how you feel best as long as it works within our counselling contract.
Individual sessions are £90 per 50 minutes
The number of sessions needed will depend on how many you want, but generally, people attend for a minimum of 8 weekly or fortnightly sessions. Some individuals continue weekly or fortnightly for a year. It’s really up to you.
Couples Sessions
In couples sessions we work on the relationship, focusing on how to help your relationship grow. within couples therapy, psychosexual work can be done too. With couples, I am trained in the developmental model by Ellyn Bader and Peter Pearson, as well as done further training with Mark Widdowson. I have also studied alternative relationships and marriages with Bernd Leygraf a psychotherapist. I have basic training in the Gottman moduality and Esther Perel’s couples therapy methods.
I can help support couples in monogamous relationships and polyamorous, and even ran a support group for people in polyamorous and open relationships for serval years in Norwich.
Fees for couples work is £100 for 50 minutes
Sex Education
If you’re looking for sex education I am able to tailor sessions for you, a family member or an organisation, ranging from contraception to consent. Workshop fees vary depending on organisation size or individual needs, so please do email me. If you are a school requiring sex education, please check out Dhiverse the sex education charity I am a trustee of, as I focus on over 18s in my sex education work.
I am a level 4 and higher qualified sex and relationship educator who has previously taught RSE at the University of East Anglia.
Psychosexual Therapy
The great thing about sex therapy such as psychosexual therapy, it can be added to all the above types of therapy! Any session can include it depending on if you need it or not. I have extensive training in psychosexual health and mental well-being, and have training in sexual health too through ASHMA, the family planning association, the NHS, and Terrence Higgins Trust. I have extended my psychosexual therapy training with Dr Tammy Nelson, Martha Kauppi, Emily Nagoski, TASHRA (focusing on kink including extreme), and many more leading experts in the field.
Writing
I offer writing including copywriting and journalism on topics in human sexuality. I am an award-winning blogger and journalist who has a notable record for writing informative pieces for the sex toy industry and specialising in campaign commentary and concepts. I currently am topping up my writing qualifications with the nctj by doing their level 5 journalism course. I have worked professionally as a journalist for over 15 years, and have both print and online articles in my portfolio. I was previously Marie Claire’s sex and relationship expert.
PR and Journos
Currently, I work alongside PRs as a paid expert, if you’re looking to get me on board of a campaign please email me to see my availability as this will depend on my current contracts. Journalists and editors, if you’re not looking to hire me to write directly for you I can sometimes offer comments for press pieces. Please note that if you are looking for press comments you may be directed to one of my PRs.
Hire Me As Your Expert
Over the years I have been the lead sex and relationship expert for various brands including for Marie Claire, Erotica UK, i play safe, Lovehoney and Je Joue. I currently am the resident sexologist for Je Joue and a part-time expert for Lovehoney. My contracts aren’t exclusive allowing me the flexibility to work on other projects.