Ness Cooper


Sex & Relationship Coach

Sex Writer

Ness Cooper


Sex & Relationship Coach

Sex Writer

Ness Cooper in the Press

As a Sex and Relationship Expert trained in Therapy, Coaching, and Education, Ness Cooper appears regularly in the media and press providing expert comments and articles.

Here’s a small selection of recent press coverage Ness Cooper has been involved in.

Marie Claire

Lovehoney Magic Wand review: “As a sex expert, here’s why the powerful sex toy is a must-buy.”

Womanizer X Lovehoney Pro40 review: “I think I’ve found the best clitoral suction toy available to buy”

LELO Enigma review: “This sex toy helped me solve the mystery of the orgasm gap”

LELO Sila sonic massager review: “Have I found my new go-to clitoral suction toy?”

LELO Sona 2 Cruise review: “The world first clitoral suction toy really surprised me – here’s why.”

Men’s Health

Best Penis Extenders UK 2022

“What is a penis extender?

The clue is in the name. ‘A penis extender is a device that can be worn to make the penis longer and/or wider,’ says Ness Cooper, Clinical Sexologist for Lovehoney, and sex and relationships coach at The Sex Consultant. Having said that, there are a number of different devices available, so it pays to do your research.”


How to tackle the temptation to snoop through your partner’s phone

‘It can break trust and boundaries,’ explains relationship expert Ness Cooper. ‘Every relationship has boundaries and listening to those is important.

‘It can be a sign of a narcissistic relationship and unhealthy control. This can limit the relationship and prevent it from growing positively.

‘There may also be unhealthy codependency going on, meaning that individual
identities are lost

Signs your casual fling has the potential to be something more

‘Be clear with your relationship goals and boundaries,’ advises sex and relationships coach Ness Cooper. ‘Understand that it may take the person you’re talking to time to process these goals and boundaries as they may have been set on the idea of hookups only.

How to deal with relationship envy

Sexologist and relationship coach Ness Cooper explains this phenomenon in a little more detail. 

She says: ‘Envy generally is when we see something others enjoy and we want it – it might be that another person’s relationship looks better to you than yours.’

This does, however, differ to jealousy – which is often when we feel our relationship is threatened.

But Ness points out that both of these emotions are completely natural.

Breakups: 5 expert tips to get you through it and heal a broken heart

“Sex and relationship coach Ness Cooper says emotions we attempt to avoid usually come out in different ways that can affect us negatively.

‘We’re not taught a lot about how to deal with our emotions, so when we do experience something big such as a breakup they can all come flooding in and it can be overwhelming,’ Ness tells

‘It’s very normal to feel like we can’t cope with them, but it’s very healthy to have these emotions come through.

‘It’s how we deal with them that’s the important thing. And taking a moment to go through them can help us work through what’s happening and deal with the situation better.’”

Sexpert tips for women to upgrade your masturbation sessions

“To help you on your journey of self discovery and better orgasms all round, we spoke to Ness Cooper, a Clinical Sexologist who works as a Sex and Relationship Coach at The Sex Consultant.

She reveals her top tips for women to level up their masturbation game, with physical and mental stimulation factored in.

Explore outercourse

When with a partner, touching and seduction are pivotal parts of the sexual experience. On our own, though, we often miss the build-up and go straight to the main event.

Flip the script on masturbation as a means to an end and try outercourse next time, giving yourself the same steady escalation in pleasure.

Ness tells that she recommends ‘massaging hands and sex toys over the external erogenous zones of your body,’ adding that you can also use ‘massage oil or an erotic massage candle to change the sensations of gliding sex toys and hands’.”

A guide to ‘micro-dating’ and how it could benefit your relationship

“Sexologist and relationship coach Ness Cooper adds that it can actually be a more practical and efficient way of spending time with someone.

She says: ‘Social expectations on dating over the years have become more and more extravagant and it’s likely we’ve forgotten that we don’t need a lot of time or money to have an enjoyable moment with someone on a date. 

‘Dating is more about the quality of interaction you have – not the time you spend on it. For some, multiple short dates may result in more quality time together – rather than arranging one big weekly date night.

‘And sometimes it can be really hard to stay focused on longer dates so micro ones can help you fully keep your attention.’

Also Ness stresses that it’s particularly great for any couples who might find themselves stuck in a bit of a rut at the moment.”

How to know when to fight for your relationship and when to leave

Sex and relationships coach Ness Cooper explains that while no one can tell you whether your relationship is healthy or unhealthy, or whether you should ‘stick it out’ or leave, there are certain signs that could point in either direction.”

From bot love to ‘comvaxability’ – big dating trends to expect in 2022

“Ness and Callisto also think that more people are aware of how important it is to commit only when true emotional fulfilment is on the table.

(So cue more people taking the getting-to-know-you stage super slowly in 2022.)

This makes sense given what we know about hesidating, a term dating site Plenty of Fish came up with earlier this winter to describe those who feel unsure if they want to date seriously or casually, since life has been so uncertain lately.

Not to mention that slow dating has been pretty popular since the pandemic began.

‘During the summer lockdown, 71% of British daters said love was more important than sex,’ Melissa Hobley, the global chief marketing officer at OkCupid, told us in late 2020.

‘This was driven by more singletons dating online and meant that we saw our daters go on and enjoy virtual dates more and more, with many claiming that they were able to get to know their date better.”

Seven Year Itch: Experts share if it’s real and how to survive it

“But is it actually a real thing that can end relationships?

Clinical sexologist and relationship coach Ness Cooper says the term was originally the title of a Marilyn Monroe film – but the general idea stemmed from there.

She tells ‘In the 1950s, people used it as a way of trying to understand why relationships declined over time.

‘It’s likely that during that time, during the post-war world, relationships were going through some unpredictable challenges – due to the uncertainty that was left behind in areas of life, from such a joint trauma.’

Today, we still use the term to describe the time period when a person might grow tired, irritated or bored of their partner. “

What to know about ‘soft swinging’ – benefits, how to do it and more

“Ness Cooper, a clinical sexologist, therapist and coach, says: ‘Soft swinging can help you avoid the emotional and moral tax society places upon penetrative sex, and help avoid negative emotions such as shame that may arise from penetrative sex due to social expectations placed on it.’”

Why ‘no-habiting’ and not co-habiting could help your relationship

“‘Some partners can find it suits their other routines well, such as mismatched work schedules,’ notes clinical sexologist and relationship coach Ness Cooper. ‘When one partner needs to sleep different hours, if the property is small it can upset another’s work-sleep pattern.

‘Benefit systems is a big player on why some partners may not live together. They may not be able to move into together due to the threat to their income, even when they require the living expenses.

‘Location to work or family can play a part in why some partners live apart. It can be hard to move away from certain obligations or family ties.

‘Personal benefits may be that some people just generally prefer living apart.

‘There are many animals that choose to live apart but still have intimate long-term relationships with another, and humans are just the same. Some of us like living apart and others prefer living together, it’s just how it is for some.

‘Being able to have your own personal space and rituals can be important and not every environment is suited for everyone to express these in.

‘It’s also ok to still keep some personal space and rituals and not everything has to be shared.’”

How many times a week should we be having sex with our partners?

“Ness Cooper, sex and relationships coach at The Sex Consultant, says no.

Cooper explains that having sex less often ‘isn’t always a sign of anything negative.’ She adds that studies indicate that on average, individuals are having sex once a week.

She says having sex less frequently ‘can be a sign that both you and your partner have formed not only your joint relationship identity with a routine but also you both are accepting each other’s individual identities and needs too.’”

Experts share eight issues that spell the end of a relationship

“‘If a partner ignores another partner and withholds communication it can be a sign that they’re not willing to put in the work,’ explains sexologist and relationship coach Ness Cooper.

‘Often when a partner refuses to work on the issues at hand, it may be a big sign that the relationship is at the end.

‘For relationships to be healthy and work, you both need to work together in helping them develop – even if it’s working through the more challenging things.’”

How to heal after dating a narcissist

“In fact, anyone who has ever dated a narcissist will know how exhausting and dangerous it can be.

Sexologist and relationship coach Ness Cooper says: ‘Dating a narcissist can affect an individual in multiple ways and this can make them lose a sense of their own identity.

‘It can have a knock-on effect on their self-esteem and confidence – and because narcissists swing from gaslighting to love bombing, it can make an individual doubt their internal world and outlook on the world.’”

How to tell someone you’re dating that they’re a bad kisser

But Annie Bennett, a psychotherapist and author, reckons it’s well worth bringing up the issue… in a nice way.

‘It only takes a conversation to work it out together,’ Annie tells

Annie suggests having a think about why the kissing might be going wrong, and sexpert Ness Cooper agrees.

Ness says: ‘When we feel someone is a bad kisser, there are some things to consider that may be influencing their kissing style:

  • They have learned kissing skills that worked in a past relationship
    and even desired by the previous person
  • They’re nervous about kissing.
  • They’ve learnt how to kiss through watching movies, other media, and
    even porn! Many of these forms of kissing will have to be done in a
    certain way depending on filming requirements. Many don’t realise that
    there is more to kissing than what we see on the screen.
  • You’re judging kissing on your past experiences and found that in past
    relationships you had that special kiss that sent you head over heels,
    and you’re craving it again.’

How to have better sex with a small penis

“The best sex positions for a small penis

Ness Cooper, a sex consultant, says there isn’t one set position to work with – but there are plenty that can help with deeper penetration.

She says: ‘Communicating with your sexual partner that you would like to try different sex positions can help you become aware of different sensations you can feel during sex – remember sex doesn’t have to be orgasm focused and this applies to those with penises too, as long as it’s consensual and feels good that it important.’”

What to do if your partner has become selfish in bed

“Sexologist and relationship coach Ness Cooper says that sometimes we think our partners are being selfish in bed, but this can actually be down to a lack of communication. 

She explains: ‘If you’re following a routine in bed, your partner may honestly think that you enjoy it that way, and the only way to change things is to talk about it.’

If this has become a more recent phenomenon, or you’re suddenly starting to notice it, it’s important to chat to your partner about it.”

The ‘zero date’ – what to know about the latest dating trend

“But clinical sexologist and relationship coach Ness Cooper stresses that this isn’t actually a new phenomenon.

She says: ‘Zero dates aren’t really a new occurrence, it’s been happening throughout society in one format or another over time. 

‘Speed dating has worked on a similar concept, but rather than being at an arranged event with a host to move things along, with zero dates the individual is being their own agent in the process from arranging to deciding whether or not it’s time to move onto the next date.’”

How to recover after calling your partner by your ex’s name

“Relationship expert and sexologist Ness Cooper tells ‘Calling someone the wrong name is very common and can happen between individuals who even feel they have a deep connection, such as a romantic partner. 

‘It can happen even during intimate moments such as sex. It’s nothing to worry about and it’s fairly common for many couples to experience at some point during their relationship.’

So the awkward moment has happened – but what do you do next?”

Open House: Meet the couples trying polyamory on national TV

Many individuals have had the chance to think about and discuss their sexual and relationship dynamic preferences over lockdowns that has led to an increase in exploring new things,’ sex and relationships expert, Ness Cooper, tells

‘Some may have realised that while their primary partner offers a lot of security and tick many relationship needs and wants, there’s still room for others to fulfill certain needs and wants, too.

‘It can be that some individuals have learned that it’s not their partner’s reasonability to see to every need and want within their relationship. And opening their relationship up to exploring polyamory may be a way to explore these other needs and wants without expecting one individual to fulfill them.’”

How to bring up marriage counselling with your partner

“Prevention is better than cure.

Ness Cooper, a clinical sexologist and relationship therapist, says: ‘It can be difficult to raise the subject of marriage counselling to a partner, but doing it as soon as you start noticing the need for it is important.

‘Many couples leave it until things have got to a very challenging point where often there are multiple things that have layered on top of each other that need discussing and working through, rather than only few problems that need resolving if they’d come to therapy when things started to become noticeable.’”

How to be a good friend when you get into a new relationship – and what to do if you’ve been ditched

“Ness Cooper is a clinical sexologist who works as a sex and relationship coach at The Sex Consultant. She tells: ‘When we bond with friends we have often developed routines that compliment and support each other, and when a change to these happens it can upset our feeling of what has become a normal way of living. 

‘This make individuals feel as if their safety network has been shaken and can lead to confusing emotions such as envy and jealously, particularly when it’s due to a friend forming a separate relationship with someone else.’”

Should you do a sex fast?

Kourtney Kardashian recently revealed she went on a sex fast as part of a ‘cleanse’, No Nut November attracts thousands of participants every year, and with the arrival of Lent come many proclamations that rather than chocolate or takeaways, people plan to give up sexual gratification.

While there’s no harm in skipping orgasms for a bit, and no, blue balls are not real, the suggestion that quitting sex can have ‘detoxing’ benefits for the mind and body needs to be taken with a massive pinch of salt.

‘There’s no evidence supporting that quitting sex benefits the mind or body,’ says Ness Cooper.

‘Many studies that suggested it helped performance, fertility, or mindfulness have all been debunked.”

What is bondage sex?

“According to sex expert Ness Cooper, it comes in many different forms.

‘Bondage sex is where one individual has control over their partner, often in the form of tying them up or restraining them,’ she explains.

‘There are some individuals who enjoy restraining their partner in consensual psychological ways, but for many it is a physical erotic act involving methods of restraint such as rope, cuffs, or even pallet/shrink wrap.

‘One example of bondage includes shibari, which is a form where a partner is restrained with rope. It’s not always erotic as some consider it as an art form due to how complicated rope work can be.

‘When performing rope bondage in an erotic setting some enjoy the ritualistic feeling it offers to their play as they carefully twine rope around the body.’

She continues: ‘Another form is using cuffs. This is a fun way to explore bondage and allows for a quick way of restraining a partner. Some also like to add in role play to their cuff session and play out certain roles to add extra excitement, like pretending to be a police officer.

‘Meanwhile, mummification is an erotic form of play where an individual is tightly confined in shrink wrap. The individual being wrapped likes the idea that they can’t escape and that that they are helpless when presented to the other individual involved.’”

Getting married young: What are the pros and cons?

“The potential ‘cons’ of marring young, in a nutshell

Couples who have married younger may not have a good understanding
about how relationships can be fluid and change and that the individuals
who form that union can change over time too.

Sometimes couples can expect things to be a certain way and stay that way for the rest of their lives together, so some younger couples aren’t always prepared for the changes that can occur throughout their lives and can find it harder to accept them when they do occur.

Often there can be expectations on how their marriage should be, and
the pressure from others can feel very overwhelming. It can be hard for
couples who marry young, to break away from peer and family views on how their marriage should and shouldn’t be.

Finances can be harder due to often only entering work close to when the couple wed. The couple may not have savings in place, and this
can make couples fight over income and bring extra challenges into the
marriage. However, this can happen at all stages of life.

Source: Ness Cooper”

How to define the rules of an open relationship

“‘Going into an open relationship and a sudden change in relationship dynamic can lead to discrepancies when rules and boundaries haven’t been made clear,’ Ness Cooper, a clinical sexologist who works as a sex and relationship coach, tells

‘It can be easy to overstep without realising, which in turn can jeopardise the safety of the relationship.’”

Sex expert shares how to use music in the bedroom

“Sex consultant Ness Cooper has explained how incorporating music in the bedroom can benefit your sex life, so load up your playlist and pull out your fanciest lingerie:

Music can heighten our sexual senses

Ness says there is research that shows that music can have a direct impact on your genitals.

‘When you pair music with consensual sexual interactions – whether that’s flirting or telling someone about a sexual story or fantasy – genital arousal and response increases more than when music isn’t played during these interactions,’ she says.

‘Neurophysiological and biology-focused research shows that music can also make us more attracted to our partners.

‘This may also explain why we become turned on by others when in group settings such as clubs.’”

50 questions to ask before making your relationship official

“Clinical sexologist and relationship coach Ness Cooper explains: ‘When we enter into a new relationship it can be easy to only see a fantasy version we hope for. 

‘Asking questions before taking the next steps can help make the relationship realistic and attainable, as you get to understand what your potential partner is really like – rather than the version we may try and project onto them.’”

Can age gap relationships ever work out?

“So what is a ‘suitable’ age gap for partners to have?

‘As long as age gaps happen between consenting adults of legal age, there shouldn’t be an issue,’ reckons clinical sexologist and relationship coach Ness Cooper.

‘The whether or not age gaps are suitable is a social construction, and some of these may’ve been influenced by current cultural belief, fertility, or wishing to continue a blood line, for example.’

Ness notes that there’s some social stigma around age gap relationships that can cause issues, with worries about what our friends and family might think causing us to doubt a relationship that might otherwise work.”

How to have sex in a heatwave – the best positions and top tips to keep cool

“The team from Condoms UK have collaborated with sex and relationship coach Ness Cooper to discuss how people can master the art of sex in the heat – in order to have a great whirlwind summer romance in 2022.”

Why it’s OK to hate your partner sometimes

“Ness Cooper, a clinical sexologist, therapist and coach, tells ‘When in a relationship we can often think that we should feel only positive emotions towards our partner – but, in fact, it’s very normal to feel both positive and negative emotions towards someone, even when we like them.’”

Woman & Home

What is the pretzel sex position? Plus, all the benefits of this intimate pose

“”If someone with a vulva is being penetrated during the pretzel, their partner’s thigh can rub over the clitoris, adding extra sensations and stimulation. Depending on the position of the partner’s thigh, the leg can move and allow easier access for fingers to stimulate the vulva and clitoris too,” says Cooper, who is also founder of The Sex Consultant(opens in new tab) and in partnership with sex toy brand Lovehoney(opens in new tab).”

My Imperfect Life

What are the most common sex injuries? A new survey reveals unpleasant findings

“The way to flag these potential problems before they happen is to be open and try talking about sex with your partner, according to Ness Cooper, a sex and relationships expert at The Sex Consultant(opens in new tab). This way, everyone is on the same page as far as desires and capabilities. Cooper is also in favor of adding a safeword to the mix.”

Red Magazine

How to have sex that feels truly great


Instead of diving into the deep end, try wading in by building up from a truly amazing kiss. How it feels and how someone tastes to you can be a great temperature test for chemistry with a partner, clinical sexologist Ness Cooper advises.

“Kissing during sex can help you sync your breath pattern with your partner, which can also start getting the pelvic floor into rhythm,” she adds. “It also helps release oxytocin, helping you bond with a partner. When we kiss another we also exchange hormones, such as testosterone, which helps turn you on and be more likely to feel up for sex.””

The Mirror

‘Green flags’ you should look for on a first date – from eye contact to compliments

Lenstore partnered with sexologist Ness Cooper from The Sex Consultant to uncover some green flags you should try to find on every date, as they could help you make a “solid judgement” about your potential partner.

Ness said: “We focus a lot on telling people to look out for red flags but regularly forget about green flags. Green flags are positive signs that the relationship is consensual, safe and has possibilities to grow both individually as well as together.”


How to spot relationship pink flags

“According to Ness Cooper, clinical sexologist and a sex and relationship coach at The Sex Consultant, there are a number of things to look out for when it comes to identifying pink flags in a romantic relationship.

She explains that ‘pink’ flags are “flags that can sometimes seem like a red flag until you actually get to know the person and reasons behind them. It’s where something can feel like a big relationship concern and worry but after communication is actually ok”.

Having a mismatched love language, opposing political views or different values when it comes to family may all be considered pink flags. They could be immediate turn-offs, or something you barely consider in a partner. “

Dating in 2022: do you have online dating burnout? We talked to experts about why it happens and what to do about it

“According to dating expert Ness Cooper, one of the main reasons is that online dating can lead us to create two conflicting personas: one that we present in the real world, and one that we present online.

“It can be hard to bring different types of relationships together when you’re dating online, such as forming a bridging connection between the persona you use to date online and the persona you use with friends and family,” she says. Trying to keep your two personas on the go can lead to stress and, after a while, signs of burnout.

Online dating can also lead to exhaustion because of a lack of boundaries. “With online dating being available 24 hours a day it can be harder to restrict boundaries,” Cooper says. “Some really enjoy the dopamine hit from getting a positive comment when searching dating sites. And while dopamine addiction isn’t a real addiction, it can still lead to compulsive habits that can add to stress.””

Daily Star

Best sex positions to try during UK heatwave – from doggy to spooning technique

“The team at Condoms UK have collaborated with sex coach Ness Cooper to reveal how to get down and dirty during a heatwave.

Not only have they revealed the best techniques, but also some tips to avoid overheating during summer sex.”

What is a UTI? How painful condition can stop you having sex

A UTI can irritate the sensitive tissue in your urinary tract, and sexual activity can irritate those tissues even more.

Sexual activity can also increase your risk of complications and potentially put your partner at risk. Doctors usually recommend avoiding sex until the infection has cleared up completely.

Ness Cooper, clinical sexologist further discusses what is a UTI and how best to avoid it.”

Steamy shower sex moves for heatwave romps – from love chair to wet wheelbarrow

“Luckily for us Ness Cooper, Sexologist at The Sex Consultant, has worked with LoveHoney to put together some top tips for having seamless shower sex.”

New York Post

Expert advises daily masturbation to ‘whet’ your depressing, dry January

“Ness Cooper, a clinical sexologist in Britain, is encouraging people to masturbate every single one of January’s 31 days, advising that dedicated self-gratification staves off seasonal depression during what studies show is the most miserable time of the year. 

Cooper also claims autoeroticism drives untold mental health benefits, and urges people to tune up their bodies when they feel their mood stalling out.”


3 crucial sex lessons Cosmopolitan learned from talking to an intimacy expert

“It’s not uncommon for people to see orgasm as the only goal of sex, particularly for cis-gendered men. But achieving an orgasm isn’t as easy for everyone as you might have been led to believe. According to research, only 6% of women always reach orgasm during sex.

‘Not everyone can orgasm through the same methods,’ explains Ness. Generally, cis-gendered women will find it easier to orgasm via clitoral stimulation but some people with vulvas might find penetrative orgasms more pleasurable.

Good Luck To You, Leo Grande’s protagonist admits that she has never had an orgasm before and this is one of the things she wants to achieve as part of her sexual exploration. But sex can still be pleasurable without orgasming, and it doesn’t necessarily need to be the goal of sex if you don’t want it to be.”

Everything you need to know about wax play

“Welcome to the wonderful world of wax play. It’s hot, it’s sticky and it’s (potentially) very fun. But, like they say, with great power comes great responsibility: it’s important to read up on how to embrace wax play safely, avoiding burns, and consensually, with safe words and open communication. Intrigued? We were too, which is why we called up Lovehoney sex expert Ness Cooper for the ultimate guide to wax play…”


What Is ‘Pegging’? Sex Act Explained

““We’ve also come a long way in realising that sexual acts don’t always define sexual orientation and maybe a way to express fantasies that are outside the sexual orientation we fall into,” Cooper, who works as a sex and relationship coach at, adds.

What’s so enjoyable about pegging?

Well, the enjoyment factor behind pegging all comes from the desire to explore new feelings of pleasure with your partner. 

The wide variety of readily-available sex toys now allow all people to consensually enjoy this act, no matter your gender or orientation. 

“Not only has our understanding of human sexuality deepened, sex toys that used to be developed for certain body parts are becoming more gender-neutral or advertised in ways that allow individuals to explore them more openly, regardless of gender,” Cooper explains.”

What Does Pressing Down On A Woman’s Stomach During Sex Do? TikTok Trend Explained

“I’m sure that video has left you wondering whether pressing on a woman’s stomach during sex can really stimulate the G-spot. So, Tyla have enlisted the help of experts like Clinical Sexologist, Ness Cooper, and Sexual and Reproductive Healthcare doctor, Dr. Deborah Lee from Dr Fox Pharmacy, to weigh in on the subject. 

Cooper, who works as a Sex and Relationship Coach at, says that “external pressure can work really well” to activate the G-spot and provide those leg-shaking orgasms we all want. 

She says: “We can be a bit too focused on penetration and forget the pleasure possibilities of stimulating elsewhere on the body.”

“We have to remember that the mind plays a big part in what we find pleasurable or not and that some people can just mentally enjoy the added stimulation of other parts of the body and this can lead to orgasmic feelings and sensations in itself,” she tells Tyla.”

The Eight Biggest Dating Red Flags To Look Out For, According To An Exper

“Cooper, founder of tells Tyla: “If there’s no room for your individual input into the relationship dynamic, this may be a sign they have a narcissistic personality.”

2) They don’t want to discuss sexual health

While your date might generally be a good communicator, perhaps they score pretty low when it comes to talking about sexual health. 

Cooper says that couples “should normalise talking about sexual health whilst making it clear that we shouldn’t stigmatise anyone who has had sexual health issues”.

“Many individuals will have some form of experience with STIs in their past. If a date reveals they have a sexual health issue, many can be treated or the spread can be prevented.

“If they are completely avoidant of talking about it after you have asked about it, it is something to consider as a possible red flag. If you do take things further and become sexual with them, implementing safer sex practises is important,” she explains.”

What Is ‘Post-Nut Clarity’? Sex Term Explained

“Yes, “post-nut clarity” is a real thing, according to clinical sexologist Ness Cooper.

“Some individuals do experience post-orgasm clarity, but it’s not fully clear as to why some do and others don’t,” Cooper, who works as a sex and relationship coach at says.”


Can The Pill Affect Your Sex Drive? We Asked The Experts

“So GLAMOUR looked into it, and there’s a lot to consider. According to Ness Cooper, a clinical sexologist and sex and relationship coach, it’s important to be clear on the difference between sex drive and libido. “Sex drive is a social construction and libido is the physiological effects of how our body responds to arousal,” she says.”

Selling Sunset fans, here’s how to effectively navigate an office romance, according to an expert

“We asked sex expert at The Sex Consultant Ness Cooper, who recently also partnered with Lovehoney, to share her top tips on managing a workplace romance. Can we promise that falling for your actual boss is going to be problem-free? No (hello, have you not got to the end of Selling Sunset season 5?), but there are definitely some things to think about that might help.”

How masturbation can help relieve all kinds of pain, from migraines to period cramps

One study found that women’s pain tolerance increased by 40% when the clitoris was “self-stimulated”, and the tolerance increased to 74% when said stimulation resulted in orgasm.

“During masturbation, endorphins and other chemicals are released and these can reduce pain,” Ness Cooper, a sex and relationships coach and clinical sexologist, explains. “These react with receptors within the brain and change how we experience pain whilst they are released during the act of masturbation and orgasm.””

Pink News

The long, deep, surprisingly versatile history of bottoms

“Ness Cooper, a clinical sexologist based in Norfolk, agrees. The act of penetrating is not as entrenched in power as it once was.

“Before it always used to be that the submissive bottom was only there for their dom’s enjoyment,” Cooper said, “but often with the discussion of limits and likes and dislikes, it’s clear that those going into submission also gain satisfied enjoyment from their partners.””

Readers Digest

A history of the New Year’s Eve kiss

“Many of us are introduced to [the New Year’s Eve kiss] in one form or another from a young age: from our parents reading us festive and holiday stories [to] attending our first disco,” says Sexologist and Sex and Relationship Coach Ness Cooper. “It may even be the first time some witness a public kiss.”


Devotees of ‘No Nut November’ say it gave them ‘superpowers’ – we asked an expert “Although people may find psychological comfort in taking part in NNN, Ness Cooper, Sexologist, Sex and Relationship Coach told Indy100, “There are no known benefits from purposely reducing the amount an individual ejaculates.” In fact, going “cold turkey from anything that has such an input on your life emotionally, psychically, and even socially, doesn’t generally work.””

If you’re seeking a sex and relationship expert for your press or media campaign you can contact Ness directly via or

Subscribe to learn free sex and relationship advice

You have successfully subscribed to the newsletter

There was an error while trying to send your request. Please try again.

Ness Cooper will use the information you provide on this form to be in touch with you and to provide updates and marketing.